East Dulwich (Mobile) Forum

Professional help for difficult 3 year old??

Hi there,

I wondered if anyone can recommend a super nanny type professional? My brother is having a very difficult time with their 3 year old. He is fine if things are going his way but can easily flip into a huge tantrum. He doesn't like interacting with other adults, so if granny comes to stay he won't leave his parents side. He often plays up at bed time too. They are feeling at their wits end as he is such hard work, though also has elements of being sweet and loving too.

Does anyone know anyone who can perhaps help? Even if it's a FaceTime call?

Many thanks
No personal experience, but Nicola Watson has been highly recommended by lots of other Forumites. Try searching her name on the Forum to read recommendations. She works one-on-one with parents to support problems related to sleep and bed time routines.

Maybe if your brother is able to get a handle on the bedtime battles, things will improve from the ground up for his little one?

Nicola's website is here: [www.childsleepsolutions.co.uk]
3 is a really tricky age, as they're becoming more independent, but are still very young children who lack impulse and emotion control and struggle with things like decision making.

I really thought we'd got off lightly, as the terrible twos were not that bad at all... but then he turned 3 and I was like "whoa... who are you, and what have you done with my son?!". There was so much rage and unreasonableness, quite alarming at times. Thankfully we're over the angry hitty phase (it seems), but I'm also aware that one phase undoubtedly leads into another :-)

I've really found that sites like Aha! Parenting help me. Dr Laura Markham has lots of great advice. I also like some of Janet Lansbury's articles too.

Also, books by Dr Dan Siegel, who is an internationally-renowned neuropsychiatrist and author of books like No-Drama Discipline: the whole-brain way to calm the chaos and nurture your child’s developing mind (Mindful Parenting) , and The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Proven Strategies to Nurture Your Child’s Developing Mind.

I've also heard good things about How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 and The Gentle Discipline Book: How to raise co-operative, polite and helpful children and ToddlerCalm: A guide for calmer toddlers and happier parents both by Sarah Ockwell-Smith.
Not such an advanced solution, but watching The Three Day Nanny series one and two on tv, gave me so many ideas and pretty much turned my son around. Also it's entertaining. So when the parents do get an hour or two at night, it doesn't feel a slog to watch a bit and pick up handy tips acted out for you to mimick. I'm sure you can buy or download it somewhere.
They may find it useful to talk to their childcare provider about how he interacts and responds to others at nursery. Before getting help, I would suggest they play detective a little to see if there's certain situations, individuals or events, foods that trigger behaviours. These are all things that a good therapist should ask so if they have these answers, it would allow them to drill into the issues quickly. Good luck.
Thanks very much all!! So helpful and great advice!
Hello Annie,

We at www.totalpickle.com offer exactly that. Myself and Emma are qualified nannies and certified sleep trainers. We offer face time consultations to trouble shoot, eating, sleeping and behaviour issues. As during our experience working with children we understand a lot of these issues are usually linked together. Please feel free to get in touch if you are still looking for help.

Kate

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